Douche

Dear Jake,
     You are an ass. I mean when I asked you to be my date to my ONE prom you said no because you were busy... which I totally get. But you weren't even sorry and that is half of the problem right there. Did you ever think I didn't want to go dateless to my prom? Did you realize I would be MISERABLE all by myself when my friends ditch me. Then you won't dance with me at camp which made me cry so hard I was half way to a full fledged freak out. Next you said you'd come to visit and that you were even talking to your mom about it. Then that NEVER happened. Finally,  I'm staying at a hotel in the city that YOU live in in two weeks and you won't hang out with me there. I get you don't want to be more than fucking (not literally) friends but FRIENDS hang out and you won't even bother doing that. I dreamt of having you as my first boyfriend, my first kiss, maybe even someday losing my virginity to you but you didn't want that so I stopped bothering you about that. Then all I wanted to know was why? You couldn't answer that so I stopped wondering. Now you won't even bother to act like a friend!. Well screw you Jake! Screw you!

Sincerely,
Kristin

Love Struck

Every teenage girl goes through with it... being a crusher. I am not your average girl. I am in a wheelchair. I am almost 18. And for the first time in my life there is someone I cannot stop thinking about. Even when I go weeks without talking to him and live what is the equivalent of a small to medium European country away from him. I have a blog but it is more about my strong views on the world while in my... state. Rather than this is just me ranting about things I don't understand. Or don't want to tell people who I know read my personal blog.... but since I'm writing this for myself I'm going to do it in letter format... Pray no one I know reads it... and use real names.

Dear Jake,

All the things I could say to you would over-power the things I've said in the past that you heard straight to your face[book]. I've said things like "Okay, honestly I really like you and I know you just want to be friends but is it because you live far away or because I really have a horrible terrible feature that turns me off to testosterone filled teenage boys?". But if I were to tell you everything I thought of you I'm afraid you'd break my heart because truth be told you've got it. I don't just like you anymore... I'm falling in love with you. Every time I see the hero guy on a show kiss up to his leading lady I think "they really aren't anything compared to Jake...". Or even if they're a good enough characters then I'll mistakenly call them Jake in a spaced out trance. Truth be told, I amazingly thought my feelings for you were just because my last hurt was from an ambulatory guy who didn't like me cause of the wheels, but you have a set of your own. And you are incredibly hot. You have a heart. It isn't a fake one either... You are smart, shy and conservative in a sweet way, and ignore my incessant rambling which is something any dream guy of mine needs. I'm in love with you and I can't get it out of my mind. I can't get you out of my mind... not even when I don't talk to you for weeks. Not when I live 3 hours away. And especially not when I try.

<3 Kristin (The girl who is shooting at you with pieces of her heart)